How to deal with mid-life crises

A place of calm

It’s going to be my birthday this week. I’ve had the same day job to pay the bills for almost two decades. I’m alone. I’m overweight. For most of my life I’ve wanted to tell stories. All I want to do is write and direct.

I’ve made over thirty short films and I’ve attempted to make my first feature film last year.

My goals feel far away and I have done very little this year to make them happen this year. Between a family crisis and the quarantine, I haven’t had the desire to put my time where it needs to go.

Taking a walk during quarantine.

And I’m at a point in my life where I likely have fewer years in front of me than I have behind me.

I’m trying to make positive steps. Since last year, I’ve drafted three feature film screenplays and I’m working on my fourth script.

I’ve also got back to editing the feature film we shot last year.

I have cinematic ideas and I want to make more films but I haven’t had the chance to go out and shoot.

Somewhere between the twentieth short film and the thirtieth, I thought something would have stuck. I thought one of the films I wrote and directed would have been…